Bathroom Troubles

I used to be a snob about public restrooms. I claimed that I would rather risk a bladder infection than expose myself to the parasites and bacteria that were found in those unsanitary little rooms. For several years, however, I have become reconciled to the reality that sometimes I just can’t be choosy. I consume beverages almost continually, and so I have become acquainted with all manner of restrooms in gas stations, restaurants, department stores, and Starbucks statewide.

I have a pet peeve regarding public restrooms that I believe many of you might share. The traditional labeling of restrooms is very simple for me to understand: it’s a little picture and the word “MEN” or “WOMEN.” In that case, I have no problem at all making the appropriate choice. I am not even bothered by bathrooms that accommodate both sexes, except for hygienic reasons. But it really throws me for a loop when certain establishments choose to label the restrooms in accordance with their decorating theme, and come up with keywords that are not immediately obvious to the non-enlightened public.

Sometimes I have to know to use the door labeled “Sheilas.” Other times I have gone into “peach” door or the “Trudy” door. My sister claims to have seen bathrooms labeled “innies” and “outies.” By far the most baffling choice I have ever faced was last night at Shivers’ Frozen Treats in College Station: Am I a “Cup” or “Cone”?

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13 responses to “Bathroom Troubles

  1. Wow. I think I would just hold it.

  2. I read an article the other day that said it’s better for your body to urinate when your body tells you than to fear the bacteria in a public restroom. You do more damage by holding than you might think. I understand the struggle though. But I got over that when I became a camper, went to the Middle East and had one of those moments in my life “when I really had to go.” But I do get frustrated when it’s only a word and no image to associate with restrooms…it’s just not fair. And you can’t be held responsible if well, you know…you go in the wrong one! Maybe that’s why it’s safer for girls to go in pairs.

  3. Yeah, I went ahead and used the facilities…we’re “cups” by the way, girls.

  4. Now I will always laugh when the ice cream scooper asks, “Cup or cone?” The Coldstone Creamery experience will never be the same!

  5. lindsey that was so funny.

  6. What exactly do you mean by…”I am not even bothered by bathrooms that accommodate both sexes, except for hygienic reasons.” Are you inferring that in some way your poop is more hygenic than us boys?

  7. Let’s just say it’s not what’s flushed that bothers me as much as what tends to stick around on the toilet afterwards.

    And let’s not tug at that thread any longer, this could get gross.

  8. The only way I knew what to do in North Africa was the picture. Thank goodness for the picture.

  9. @Karen: Good point! Hahaha!

  10. @Lindsey: what does “lego ergo sum” mean in English? I need this for class.

    Your bathroom blog is hilarious!

  11. I think it is “I read, therefore I am.”

  12. Thanks, that makes sense because it is on the front of the vocabulary lessons on my new computer software.

  13. In the Middle East, toilets had Russian tubes…which meant nothing went down but the essentials…thus they don’t use toilet paper period. Then you realize its not the bathrooms that you need to worry about, it’s shaking their hands! Yea…that’s where I’ll leave that.

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