A Wild Hair

My hair has done all sorts of things, with and without my permission, over the past several years.  Right now, this is the look I’m sporting:

It’s straight, slightly layered, and short enough to be low-maintenance.  The sunglasses also are a pretty regular part of my look, more for practical reasons than style, although I do like the relaxed-headband effect.

Anyway, I like to think that this hair represents who I am: un-fussy, unflappable, classy and timeless.

And.  yet.

The other day I caught my mom surveying me over the lunch table, her eyes narrowed and mouth in a critical frown in that “something is not right” expression that only a mother can pull off without offending.  I began checking my lips, chin, and teeth for stray bits of lunch.

“I’m trying to figure out what your hair is doing.”  she explained, when she saw that she had my attention.  She leaned over to give me the mother-gorilla inspection, and then leaned back, her curiosity satisfied.

“I see,” she said, diplomatically.  “Some of your hairs that are–well, another color–are not behaving the same way as your regular hairs.”

It took me a minute to figure out what she meant.  After all, despite Nick Arrojo’s recommendation, my hair has always been only one color; I’ve always been too cheap and lazy to for highlights or dyes of any kind.  Surely she couldn’t mean…

Oh yes, she did.

As if having two cowlicks and strange new-mom-bangs has not been enough, my hairline is also being graced with a rowdy crop of wild gray hairs.  Despite my best efforts with the straightener and various slicking hair products, these wiry hairs are resisting all of my efforts to domesticate them.  They prefer to reach for the sky and wave around in the air like little tribal dancers.

Now I have nothing against gray hairs.  I’ve expected to go gray sometime in my thirties, just like a certain member of my family who shall remain nameless, with whom I share many physical similarities.

I’ve always planned to embrace my grays when they came, because I’ve assumed they would play by the same rules as my brown hair.  If anything, they would represent my true self even better: un-fussy, unflappable, classy, timeless, AND wise!

But these strange hairs with a mind of their own are messing with my plan.  I am not a chemistry professor, Rob Pattinson, an anime character, or any other sort of person who could pull off the every-strand-for-itself hair effect.  So far I’m resorting to plucking out the offending hairs.  We’ll see what wears thin first–my resistance or my hairline.

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7 responses to “A Wild Hair

  1. I started going grey at 18- I would be plucked bald-headed if I had kept up the tweezer action for very long. Grey hair has many more layers of cuticle on the shaft, which is why they stick up and do crazy things! I am thankful for hair color! Men look distinguished and wise when they turn grey. Women look old. Sorry- not very pc- but there it is. I am too vain to look old before I have to. So as long as I can pay someone else to color them, or lift my arms to color them myself, this woman’s grey hair will be buried under a coat of ammonia products. And I’m ok with that. BTW- I like your current haircut! Cute, chic, low-maintenance and classy!

  2. Well, I am mortified to realize that my unselfconscious inspection of your hair is causing you to worry…the funny thing is: You are the most beautiful you have ever been in your life. Numerous people have commented to me about it – now you just need to believe it. 🙂

  3. Carolyn Dickinson

    love your wit and vocabulary; pure joy to read your prose.

    and, btw, you DO look more beautiful than ever!

  4. I agree. You are beautiful! And I love your grey hairs. 🙂

  5. By the way, according to a couple of internet searches…
    grAy is how it’s spelled in America
    grEy is how it’s spelled in England.
    So Amy is showing off her international flair. 🙂
    But not her grey hair.
    Which only seems fair.
    Not that I care.
    So there.

  6. @ Everyone- you are all super sweet. Compliment-comments are always accepted!

    @ Amy- does dye fix behavioral issues, too? Or just make the little crazies less noticeable?

    @ Mom- thanks for the informative poetry. Not surprised that Amy is the one to bring a little international sophistication to the discussion.

    • I am literally laughing out loud at Carol’s little rhyme:)
      I have found that color does tame those issues of the wiry texture. It has to do with the number of folicles (sp?) on a grey/gray hair verses any other color. Something about the color process softens those folicles. If you are interested, I have a friend who owns a salon and specializes in all-natural hair color with no ammonia or peroxide.

      Also- I think you are stunningly beautiful!

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