Least Favorite Words

I’d have plenty of opinion-imposing to do if the world was mine to rule, but one of my early decrees would be to ban this list of my

Top Ten Most Cringe-Worthy Words:

1.  Teat.  I hate this word even when it’s the right word for the conversation (e.g. at a dairy).  I double-hate the slangy word that sounds like “teat” that is NEVER the right word for the conversation, in my opinion.

2.  Ain’t.  And I don’t care if it’s in the dictionary.

3.  Ginormous.  Giant is a perfectly appropriate word, as is enormous.  Put them together, and you are Buddy the Elf.  It really perplexes me to hear this word more frequently in conversation, used by people who expect to be taken seriously.  It’s really irratannoying.

4.  Uvula.  I’m sure there’s a great Latin  root word in there that explains everything, but I don’t know it.  Meanwhile, this word just sounds obscene.

5.  Fart.  Why are we talking about this, anyway?  Of all the words for flatulence, this is my least favorite.

6.  Any word to describe what you just did in the bathroom.  While we’re on the subject…

7.  Tendril.  I don’t have problems with tendrils themselves, but this word gives me the willies.  Something about “en” being in such proximity to”dr” just feels wrong.

8.  Whatthe–.  I’m with First Lady Margaret Kramer from My Fellow Americans on this one: If you’re going to say it, go for the gold.  If it’s not the right place or the right time, stick with the always-proper “what in the world!?”  and don’t try to look more Bad-“A” than you really are.

9.  Epic.  This is actually a great word.  But it’s so overused that it means nothing these days.  Unless you want to say this is an epic blog.

10.  Anyways.  Somewhere along the way I learned that this word should never have the “s” at the end.  Since then, I’ve seen it in reputable printed contexts that have made me wonder if this is really a hard-and-fast rule, but I can’t get over the cringing.  It’s “anyway”!


8 responses to “Least Favorite Words

  1. super-Hi-larious!

  2. You must love our get togethers! I mean all we talk about are the ginormous farts, people’s uvulas (and other people’s parts), teats (given all the breastfeeding) and of course the potty talk!

  3. Is this a contest to see if we can use all of these words in one sentence?

  4. this post is legend…wait for it…erical.

  5. This whole list (except for uvula) is a list of my husband’s most commonly used words/topics of discussion. I guess if we ever have you guys over for dinner I will have to prep him in advance in appropriate conversation topics! Ha-ha!

  6. Loren Messarra

    It’s good to know I’m not the only one who obsesses over words and how they sound. On my most hated list:

    rural : No matter how you pronounce it, it still sounds like you’re saying it wrong.

    Humble, TX (“uumble”): Because how in the world did this tiny suburb gain the authority to take a common word and mis-pronounce it, then snicker at all the “non-locals” who pronounce the “H”? So annoying.
    In general, it irks me that many “uustonians” skip H’s altogether and say things like “uuman” for “human”.

    Like: It’s not that descriptive, yet we’re forced to use it due to a lack of other choices to express affection. It’s prominence as an overused modifier in the 90’s just made me, like, loathe it all the more.
    And while I’m on this rant, it really bothers me that English only has one word for “love” – it’s completely insufficient for expressing the range between loving Dr. Pepper and loving my husband. (Although I do feel quite strongly about both.)

    I could go on, but it’s probably best that I stop here. 😉

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