For all my ranting about traditional family values, I’ve actually come to accept the fact that a modern marriage is often made up of a woman, a man, and his iPhone.
We became this kind of married trio just before Christmas, and to be totally transparent and honest, we’re still learning how to navigate the complicated waters of our new relationship dynamic.
I have a love/hate relationship with the iPhone.
I am resentful when it demands attention at all hours of the day with its needy beeping and vibrating. I’m threatened by the fact that the iPhone always looks sleek and sexy in its tight-fitting Otter box, while I feel more and more dumpy in loose-fitting dresses and belly panel shorts.
There are days when I feel dull and inferior compared to Words with Friends. I feel inadequate and witless when I can’t remember directions, calendar events, or trivia with the same speed and accuracy. I am upstaged as a spiritual helpmate to Stephen by the iPhone’s ability to recall long texts of Scripture along with relevant cross-references.
And yet…I did love it when we drove to Colorado and the iPhone directed us to the nearest Cracker Barrel in every major metropolitan area we drove through. When we stop at Lowe’s and Stephen runs in while I wait in the car with Abby, the iPhone can be very pleasant company. After we’re tucked into bed and I realize that I left the car windows cracked, one glance at the iPhone can reassure us that no rain is expected overnight. And if counting sheep ever doesn’t work, the iPhone can sing us a lullaby through its tiny speakers.
The three of us recently got away on a romantic getaway, and while occasionally three was a crowd, the iPhone did prove its usefulness in helping us find fun local restaurants and giving us the lowdown on the latest movie releases.
Old-fashioned marriage between two people is not easy, and every device added to the union compounds the difficulty. But the rewards of a harmonious and loving home are worth the sacrifices; thus our daily commitment to make things work through good apps and bad, in good reception and in dropped calls, in 3G or in 4G, until the device becomes obsolete or we become eligible for an upgrade.